Wisdom From Youngest

Standing in line at a checkout, Baseball Chick says "I HATE long lines...wait - mom I already know what you are going to say 'don't say HATE'...I don't LIKE long lines."
"Great," I say, "glad you fixed it."
Youngest replies, "Yes, don't say ‘hate’. Or else you're life will be NO GOOD."

Baseball Chick: “Dad, how did you make that ice tea that fast? I didn’t see anything but water in there.”
The Hub: “Easy, I just scrubbed some of my skin off into the container and tah-dah! It turned to from water to ice-tea.” He says, as he demonstrates scraping his skin into the pitcher.
Baseball Chick: “No! Dad, really!”
Youngest, as he stares intently at the Hub and and his hands: “No. not possible. You still have skin left. If you scrapped your skin off you would be white.”

Youngest jumps onto an escalator going down, finds himself balancing between two steps, and remarks: “whoa! That was dramatic!”

“Pnut, your other name is Pnut. Do you know what that means?”
“No, boy. What does that mean?”
“It means that when you grow up you will turn into a peanut. Because that’s what happens when someone is named Pnut. They have to turn into a real peanut.”

Riding in the backseat home from daycare, Youngest ponders: “Mom, how come the car goes by itself sometimes.”
“When do you see the car going by itself, Youngest?”“You know, sometimes the car is moving and your hands aren’t on it. How come it does that?”
“Where would my hands be, Youngest?”
“You know, on your cell phone, reading a book, you know…when your hands are not on the car.”
“OH! Ummm… (haha) well, um. UM…there’s this thing called a pedal and when you push the pedal…” – my weak attempt at changing the way this conversation was going…

“Oh! Mom! There’s that store…Five Below. Can we go in and buy something?”
“No, Youngest. Not today. We’re not shopping today.”
“No, mom. Not ‘shop’…’buy’. ‘Buy’, I said. I don’t want to shop, just buy something.”
“That’s the same thing, Youngest. Two words that are the same.”
“No, mom. Shopping is when you go to the mall and you walk around. Buy is when we go to five below and ‘buy’ something I want. See, you understand now?”

Around the dinner table, Soccer Chick shares a story she read about an 8 year old girl who is a fantastically gifted artist, selling her works of art for up to $25,000 a piece.
I say, “My only question is with all of you here at this table, who’s got something that can make us some money? Surely, one of you has something.”
Soccer Chick – “You know I can sing mom.”
Baseball Chick – “I can play baseball and I love to read. Will that work?”
I say, “Youngest, I am going to put you on TV.”
“Okay mom. I am sneaky. I can sneak around and take people’s money when they aren’t looking.”
“um. Okay, No!”