Ever wonder why things work out just the way they do? Today, my early morning events have me reflecting on just this. Today was my early day, time to wake up before the whole house and get out to work for office coverage at our satellite location. Let's just say NOT near to my home. Thankfully, this happens only a few days per month. And since they require extra energy and for me to be up before the sun, these special days require a Starbucks stop. Before rushing out of the door I had just enough time to update the church's Facebook page with this random thought: "God's timing is not our timing. Thank God that He knows more than we do."
Lacking cash, I hit up my daughter's stash. I know you are "tsk"ing and shaking your fancy little heads. You, of course, would never take money from your child. I know, I know. Horrendous. But we're talking pre-dawn behavior here. I think that counts for some sort of justified rationalization. In any case, $6 bucks later I'm headed out the door. I make my Starbucks pit stop and am pleasantly rewarded by their mistake. They grant me a venti and I've paid for grande. A venti is for sure too much coffee for me. I would never think to order one of those on my own. But hey, their mistake is my blessing, I think, as I drive away. I trudge on to work with a satisfied smile. As a slow coffee-sipper, I know this big 'ole venti coffee is going to last me all day long. Perfect.
Miraculously, I make it to work a full 30 minutes before our office doors are due to open. In the quiet, I am peacefully think how sweet it is to have the these precious moments to set up the office and relax before the onslaught arrives. No sooner than I get myself situated, a simple swipe of the hand leaves me with my mouth hanging open, in total awe as I watch my venti coffee pour out across the desk. Isn't coffee the most marvelous color? Maybe just coffee with the right amount of whipped cream and creamer mixed in is. Lovely how Starbucks makes it. As beautiful as it is, there I stood watching it spill out all over the desk. Incredible. I think I even heard myself gasp out loud. How could something so great be gone so fast?
I spent the next 15 minutes sopping up what would have been a lovely morning. Coffee everywhere and not a drop left in the cup. Unbelievable. And hours later, everything still smells like coffee. Is this punishment? I didn't get to drink it but I get to smell it all day long. Perplexed at how this all happened so fast, I wondered, how is it that I seem to be blessed with something a little extra special. I got a venti by accident, for goodness sakes. How often does that happen? And yet, I didn't get to enjoy that venti. I didn't even get to enjoy a tall. Heck, I didn't drink enough of it to measure up to a "short", if there were such a thing.
So, I wonder, why is it that things work just the way they do? Sometimes situations are just perplexing. It seemed that my timing allowed me to get a little special gift on my way to work this morning, only to have that gift taken from me. Perhaps I didn't need the coffee. Perhaps I shouldn't have robbed my poor, innocent 9 year old's stash. Perhaps it didn't mean anything other than God's timing is not our timing. Ever have a door open up for you and it just feels right? Feels like this is exactly what God wants to have happen. Only to have that same door swing shut with a thud. Boom. Door. Slammed. Closed. Ouch. It happens. Usually after such an encounter, we go back and question, "why in the world did God allow this to happen to me?" We go on with our thoughts, reflecting on what a great and deserving person we happen to be. Yet, we got jilted. Or so it feels. Perhaps, the entire experience worked out exactly the way God intended.
Remember that Facebook post this morning? Even when we think we know something about God, we truly know very little. I thought I was being super fancy and uber-smart posting that clever status. Wanted to encourage my peeps, you know? Yet, I didn't know that I would have this funny little thing happen to me that would deprive me of what I thought had been given. Life is just like that. Full of changes, near-misses, could have beens and (we think) should have beens. But, as I sighed heavily and swept up my oh-so-beautiful coffee drippings I realized it wasn't meant to be. If it didn't happen, it just wasn't meant to. This is a motto for life that I try to live by. I usually want to say "God direct my life. If you want me to have it, I will have it. If you don't, I won't." I don't always feel that content and peaceful about life changes and situations, but a motto gives you something to aspire to, right? It takes work. I mean, let's be real. I would rather have had the coffee this morning. Well, instead of getting stuck on that, I'll just remember the good times we had...in the car this morning...the few sips I was able to embrace. Meanwhile, the smell of coffee lingers, just to make sure I don't forget. And every so often I pick up something that has one little teeny-weeny drop of caramel covered pleasure on it, and I remember, this is what was not to be. Just the way God intended it.
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